tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-166322802024-03-07T02:57:44.780-06:00The House Rock BuiltScouting Reports, Analysis, and a twisted insight into the soul of a fan.fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comBlogger587125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-64718793572655838392014-11-07T22:40:00.000-06:002014-11-07T22:40:13.444-06:00Stuffing the Passer - Flight of the PhoenixHey gang. Amish here, checking in from the airspace above Sky Harbor International Airport in Phoenix. Here's the latest episode of StP, done entirely on my airplane ride from Chicago. 4 hours, 1,800 miles, and one freaked out person who had the misfortune of sitting next to me later, we're all set. <a href=http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/comicbook/s6e02>Enjoy</a>!<BR><BR>Standard caveats apply. Best viewed on desktop browser. Firefox for Mac for some annoying reason doesn't work. There should be animations, otherwise consult your local teenager for technical help.<BR><BR><center><a href=http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/comicbook/s6e02/page1.html><img src=http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/comicbook/s6e02/S02P01.png border=0><BR>(click to view)</a></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-32197816745303078242014-10-31T14:12:00.000-05:002014-10-31T16:59:35.077-05:00Stuffing the Passer - Justice Never ForgetsSo.... we're back. Kind of. Pretty much.<br />
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Okay, there's some slight modifications to the format this year. Largely out of necessity, we've moved from a video format to a graphic novel/comic book/whatever/cinegraph format. Also because it seems cool. So... housekeeping... you're probably not going to want to read this on your tablet/mobile device, which has annoying restrictions on auto-loading and auto-playing looping videos. You can still see it, but it will be lifeless and non-animated.<br />
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Now, I'm off to interview for the Michigan AD job. I'm bringing pizza.<br />
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<b>Update</b>: Hmmm. Blogger seems to suck. I'm not going to embed the whole story, you'll have to click through to <a href="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/comicbook/s6e01/page2.html">read it here</a>. Also, make sure you give it enough time to load up the motion content. Experimental technology. Work in progress here, people.<br />
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<center><a href="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/comicbook/s6e01/page2.html"><video loop autoplay muted src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/comicbook/s6e01/C01P01.mov" poster="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/comicbook/s6e01/C01P01.jpg" type="video/mp4" width=700 height=394><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/comicbook/s6e01/C01P01.jpg" width=700 height=394></video><br />
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(click to read the full story)</a></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-7001056955502711702014-10-28T21:27:00.000-05:002014-10-28T21:27:34.923-05:00Stuffing the Passer Season 6<center><video width="640" height="480" autoplay loop muted src="http://thehouserockbuilt.com/images/soon.mov" type="video/mp4" poster="http://thehouserockbuilt.com/images/soonmov.jpg"></video></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-59185438579143072012014-09-11T22:45:00.002-05:002014-09-12T08:15:22.393-05:00September 29, 2007<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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That was the last time that Purdue beat Notre Dame. The world was a totally different place back then. I had a flip-phone. I'm pretty sure Taylor Swift wasn't a thing yet. We had a divided government, we were escalating our commitment to an unwinnable quagmire in Iraq, and everyone was angry because George R.R. Martin was taking for-<i>goddamned</i>-ever to finish his next novel. Wait...<br>
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At any rate, a popular Notre Dame internet discussion forum was asking everybody where they were for that... ignominious game... which prompted our own irishoutsider to finally sit down and put quill to parchment about the wicked fun trip we took to Florida that weekend in those heady, pre-puppets, pre-wives-and-babies mid-to-late-00's. It was glorious. With his permission I have cross-posted it here for the world to bask in.</div>
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My own account of the tale is <a href="http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2007/09/two-upsets-250-beers-and-one-broken.html">here</a>, but it's short and it sucks and you probably shouldn't even bother with it. I think I was still sweating out the poison at the time. </div>
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Enjoy!</div>
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-fightinamish</div>
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<b>Florida Has Its Own Tag,</b> by irishoutsider<br>
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tl;dr Before the puppets, we had a ridiculous time in Florida<br>
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Amish and I gave {} fucks and headed south that weekend. In very short amount of time, we managed to grab student tickets to Florida-Auburn at The Swamp and also catch a Friday night opening act in Tampa: USF-West Virginia<br>
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I think all 4 teams were in the top 5? USF stormed the field and this iconic HouseRockBuilt photo was taken:<br>
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[<i>fightinamish: Yeah, that's me and singlet guy</i>]</div>
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After some late extracurricular activity in Tampa, we set out to Gainesville bright and early to catch the ND-Purdue Pam Ward special in whatever dive bar we could manage. <a href="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/coppermonkey.jpg">The Copper Monkey</a> let us watch on a broke ass TV/VCR combo that had hooked up in the corner, and we decided to make things interesting.<br>
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A shot of whiskey every time ND scores or makes a grievous error. This establishment was kind enough to serve their shots in the larger plastic containers used to hold chicken wing dipping sauces.<br>
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I believe we proceeded to open the game with 2 airmailed shotgun snaps, a few INT, and an ND INT for TD, affectionately known as Ze Pickenhouse.<br>
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We had a ways to go before we met up with a local Florida blogger, and the bartender was pretty cool about the entire endeavor. "Guys, it's early. I'm not going to cut you off, but I'm worried about you." In a compromise, we switched to Apple Pucker as to delay alcohol poisoning for at least a few more hours.</div>
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We eventually met up with <a href="http://edsbs.com/">Orson Swindle</a> and proceeded to tailgate with him and his lawyer in an undisclosed location. The rest is a blur from here as I only remember what I think was Keystone Light and tackle football. Amish managed to pipe hit Swindle and proceed to celebrate with the Shawne Merriman Lights Out dance (<i>fightinamish: <a href="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/beforedecleating.jpg">this picture</a> was taken like 25 seconds before said decleating. This was taken <a href="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/battledamage.jpg">a few seconds after</a></i>).</div>
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We settled into the <a href="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/theswamp.jpg">Gator student section</a>, fully prepared to call truce for the evening and do as the Romans do. Then, Urban came on the jumbotron, and we knew in our hearts that this was unpossible. We managed to keep a good face on things right until Auburn kicked the winning field goal, silencing the Hellmouth that was The Swamp after dark.<br>
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Before we headed back to Tampa that night, we met back up with the Swindles and proceeded to the closest Sonic for post-game toasters and cherry-lime ades at <a href="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/spencersonic1am.jpg">what I think was 1 am</a>. The drive home was spent through the unlit everglades, making sure we weren't pulled over by alligators who had eaten Highway Patrol and put on their uniforms in order to capture and eat speeding motorists [<i>editor's note: I drove. Irishoutsider was unconscious, snoring and drooling in the passenger seat the entire time</i>].</div>
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fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-46703780108590090462014-09-04T13:22:00.003-05:002014-09-05T11:06:35.690-05:00Blogjammin' with mgoblog PART THE FINAL.<img align="left" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/thewall.jpg" width="300" />And here we are... after 600 (ish) consecutive years of pre-game gabs, we have reached the ultimate mgoblog-House Rock Built blogjam. That's right, random mgoblog commentator <a href="http://mgoblog.com/content/vicious-electronic-questioning-2-house-rock-built-returns#comment-2153425">Cosmic Blue</a>, I <b>was</b> correctly using the term "penultimate" last year I AM RIGHT AND YOU ARE WRONG AND YOU THOUGHT I FORGOT SOME RANDOM INTERNET COMMENT FROM ONE YEAR AGO BUT YOU ARE WRONG THE HOUSE ROCK BUILT NEVER FORGETS. NO. THE HOUSE ROCK BUILT NEVER FORGETS.<br />
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Ahem, sorry. So here we stand, before the last ever football game in the history of ever between these proud schools. In the past, we have done our conversations in costumes — <a href="http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2013/09/blogjammin-with-mgoblog.html">Victorian Era suits and overcoats</a>, <a href="http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2009/09/blogjammin-fightinamish-returns-from.html">bell-bottomed leisure suites</a>, <a href="http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2008/09/blogjammin-gallows-humor-abounds-with.html">powdered wigs</a>, <a href="http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2007/09/blogjammin-grimly-satisfying-evening.html">tapioca wrestling unitards</a>, and <a href="http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2006/09/lets-tussle-michigan-bloggers.html">luchador masks</a> — but not this year. This being our last battle ever, we conducted it the only way we could. Naked. Greatswords in hand. On a top of a wall of ice 900 feet high. The fate of the realm in our hands.<br />
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Read on, if you dare. I'm in italics, other Brian @mgoblog is in blue.<br />
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<b>fightinamish</b>: <i>Greetings, stranger.</i><br />
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<b>mgoblog</b>: Hello, Stouffer. Before we start and this is not my fault I have a wife who listens to mope all the time and probably doesn't even appreciate Morrissey ironically, but I am aware of this song by some Canadians that is basically this game.<br />
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So let's embed that sucker up and feel the icky breakup 100%.</blockquote>
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<em>See, I think it's more like the "Treaty of Versailles Bowl". In that, yeah our long mutually-ruinous conflict is ending, but, come on, we all know we'll be right back in 10 to 20 years.</em><br />
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<img src="http://thehouserockbuilt.com/images/tofv.jpg" width="600" /><br />
<i>Oh yeah this is totally going to last.</i></center>
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There are icky breakups like that. I'd say a solid 30% of personal interaction is a reenactment of Western European warfare from about 1400-2000. Less syphillis these days.</blockquote>
<i>Outside of Columbus, yes.</i> [EDITORS NOTE: Like, literally six hours after we had this chat ND announced a <a href="http://www.und.com/sports/m-footbl/spec-rel/090414aab.html">home-and home with Ohio State</a>. That's like, gawd, I don't know, your girlfriend breaking up with you, then taking off with your mother on a cross-country bank robbing spree. Surely there's an emo song about that somewhere.] <br />
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</i> <i>See, we're laughing together. That's the healing starting.</i><br />
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We had this conversation last year and I was all like THIS IS THE DEATH OF FOOTBALL and you were like "eh, we'll schedule Texas or something." Still your wavelength?</blockquote>
<i>Well. Maybe now that it's just a few days away the reality is setting in. I actually did get sad when I realized this was the last one for the foreseeable future. It's been a deeply unhealthy and abusive relationship, but it's been our life for so many years. That counts for something.</i><br />
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</i> <i>I mean, even when Sid and Nancy broke up it was sad. Cause he killed her.</i><br />
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<i>Notre Dame and Michigan, in happier times.</i></center>
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What are we supposed to do without Notre Dame to give us the false impression that we might really have something this year before our season collapses into a miasma of wet farts and tackles for loss? (Will I learn if Michigan wins Saturday? ABSOLUTELY NOT WOO COFOPOFF HERE WE COME!)</blockquote>
<em>Yeah, the Sid Vicious parallels are eerie. This rivalry has been all about one team waking up in a drugged-out stupor next to the corpse of the other, then going on a three-month heroin binge and ending up dead in a ditch.</em><br />
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Well, 2012 Notre Dame had quite a run there before Alabama got in all the humiliation Michigan experiences over the course of a season in one game*. *[Offer not valid for seasons in which Michigan plays Alabama.]</blockquote>
<i>But yeah, 2012 wasn't really a Sid Vicious season since it took a while for everything to catch on fire. We stayed clean for a really long time, then had one fatally tragic nose-dive. I guess that was more of a Philip Seymour Hoffman season.</i><br />
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</i> <i>/fightinamish has been banned from the chat room for egregious violation of the TOO SOON policy</i><br />
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Let's stick to the jokes about the War of the Roses.</blockquote>
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<i>Slightly less depressing than heroin overdoses, emo, and Michigan football. Slightly.</i></center>
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<em>This has gotten dark. I blame Canadian emo-rockers.</em><br />
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Anyway: it is going to feel weird as hell next year when Michigan's nonconference schedule is Arkansas and three games against BYU or something. I know that feeling because Michigan and Notre Dame have taken two-year breaks in the past and those years are disorienting. The Michigan-ND game is a landmark; without it I may take a wrong turn at Ohio and end up in France.<br />
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Which is a much better place than Ohio but sucks at football.</blockquote>
<em>Don't sleep on Les Bleus. I think they're on your 2016 schedule.</em><br />
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<i>Franck Ribéry: tall enough to play OL for Micihgan. Pretty enough to win the Miss Michigan pageant.</i></center>
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I think I may choose to sleep on the French Inverse Steamrollers.<br />
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But anyway, the GAME TO END ALL GAMES (until we decide to restart the series): how are we feeling? Going to have enough bodies to field a defense over there?</blockquote>
<em>Yeah. Well. At the Rice game I decided to take a shot every defensive play I said "Thank God we didn't do that against Michigan." Long story short I died and had to be resurrected by some horrid black spell that will leave my family accursed for a hundred generations.</em><br />
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ND's 3205 offensive coordinator will be Al Borges MCMXLIII then. Settled.</blockquote>
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<i>Tremble before RoboBorges.</i></center>
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<i>Ack. So there are things worse than death. But yeah, body-wise, everything seems to be at least in roughly working order. Just a lot of sloppiness. New scheme, new players, curious absence of 9,000 pound NFL linemen.</i><br />
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</i> <i>I'm sure we'll get it all perfectly straightened out five seconds after the end of this game.</i><br />
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The thing that surprises me is what's going on at linebacker. How is ND starting a guy who was a WR last year and a walk-on next to Jaylon Smith? What happened there and are these guys "no seriously this could work out" types or "I am a 6'1" OL" types, about whom we'll speak more of later no doubt.</blockquote>
<i>Yeah, it's not optimal. It's always more comforting to have a 28th year senior anchoring the linebackers (don't publish this, but we grow Maurice Crums in a lab under the biology building. We're on Maurice Crum the 12th right now).</i><br />
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</i> <i>But you've got to roll with what you've got. A talented monster who's probably not yet in his prime and some spare parts. I actually thought the walk-on looked pretty comfortable out there, though. *DISCLOSURE: Brian Stouffer is not licensed to give football scouting advice and was blind drunk on Saturday.</i><br />
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</i> <i>So since we're diving in and confronting our darkest fears... um, what is your darkest fear? I would guess it's that your rushing game has a propensity to gain negative yardage on multiple axes, going backward and burrowing down into the earth. But, who am I kidding, you're always good for 900 yards against ND.</i><br />
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My darkest fear is that ND plays the innovative 1-5-5 and Sheldon Day ends up with 30 tackles and 10 sacks. I really have no idea what to expect from this offensive line; Appalachian State was just so so bad that you can't really take much from that performance and when they've gone up against Michigan's line in scrimmages they go about two yards and then stop. Which is a massive improvement, but still not real good.<br />
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But yeah. How is the rest of the line, anyway? I am unfamliar with these dudes.</blockquote>
<i>Yeah it's funny how running a 3-4 with two first day draft picks makes you forget about your whole DL depth. But we have been taking good care of that position on the recruiting trail, so we're actually well-supplied with big angry upperclassmen. We're back to a 4-3 system and it looks like a much more natural fit for our talent.</i><br />
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</i> <i>Well, probably anything looks natural against Rice. But this looked... especially natural.</i><br />
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The ends are pretty young, aren't they?</blockquote>
<em>Well... they're green. Unblooded. Last-minute depth chart engineering is not fun. Would not recommend.</em><br />
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/starts twitching about last year's OL</blockquote>
<em>Yeah. So has that all been solved?</em><br />
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HA HA YES DEFINITELY</blockquote>
<em>Well that does it then. We concede.</em><br />
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</em> <i>You got rid of those pesky NFL-caliber tackles. That should help.</i><br />
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I'm actually being told now that this is not so much true. The numbers are what they are: Michigan has no senior OL on the roster and only two upperclassmen, one of whom is a walk-on. They're starting a true freshman at left tackle. It does not look like a good look. In their defense, the chaos last year was not all their doing. And Michigan gets taht walk-on, Graham Glasgow back after a one game suspension. That's a big deal because he was their best interior OL last year. I expect he slots in at right guard, displacing that other walk-on, the 6'1" one.<br />
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I am rather glad that Nix and Tuitt are no longer around, I guess is what I'm saying. </blockquote>
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<img src="http://thehouserockbuilt.com/images/dwarves.jpg" /><br /><i>Well... at least Michigan's OL is well-armored.</i></center>
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<i>Oof. Yow. That sounds rough. Is there a sliver lining on your offense there? Fifth year Devin Gardner is something to be happy about, yes? I believe a Michigan blogger I know once said he's Vince Young except he smells like jasmine.</i><br />
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</i> <i>Or has the affair cooled off? I sort of tuned out after the ND game last year when he ascended to heaven on a chariot pulled by a thousand white steeds.</i><br />
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For a lot of people, yeah. I'm still driving the chariot, as Gardner's 2013 has to be taken in its proper context: every other play he was picking linebacker out of his ribs as Michigan's pass protection utterly collapsed. He was clearly worn down by midseason and literally played the OSU game on a broken foot. If you put him on a team that protects him he has a lights out season. He does make too many DEVIN NO throws even considering that context, but all in all he's a huge asset. Especially early, when his ribs are still discrete objects instead of bloody bone-mash.</blockquote>
<em>Yeah I felt the same way about Gardner. I always thought he was a capable QB who just had the misfortune of having his soul violently flayed off of him over the course of several months.</em><br />
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Speaking of deciphering QBs: Everett Golson was repeatedly pulled for Tommy Rees a couple years ago, missed a season, and then looked like a Predator version of Joe Montana against Rice. What kind of expectations are we having for him on Saturday?</blockquote>
<i>BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOD</i><br />
<i>I expect bloooooooooood.</i><br />
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<i>Artist's rendition</i></center>
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We did predict that last year. I remember this. <a href="https://twitter.com/godtributes">Blood for the blood god</a>.</blockquote>
<em>Brian. My man. You forget how much you're playing with one hand tied behind your back when you don't have a quarterback who can run, threaten to run, pretend to run, or gradually tip over in a forward direction.</em><br />
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</em> <i>It's a different sport with Gholson out there. The red zone is no longer a DEN OF ETERNAL NIGHTMARES, third and shorts are suddenly less mortifying, and yeah everything is happier and footballier.</i><br />
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</i> <i>Just the mere potential of a quarterback running a few yards is like playing offense with a whole extra player.</i><br />
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(Please don't ask me about Michigan's QB recruiting at this juncture.)</blockquote>
<em>Does that mean we'll soon be seeing 7 foot tall quarterbacks with knees that don't bend in the maize and blue? Then all is right with the universe again.</em><br />
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There may be a gentleman of that description on the roster now. The current heir apparent is relatively athletic, at least.<br />
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But that has naught to do with THE GAME TO END ALL GAMES until we schedule some more. Let's talk Irish running game. Brian Kelly going to bother with it at all? He seems to hate it.</blockquote>
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To see the answer to that question, and the thrilling conclusion, <a href="http://mgoblog.com/content/vicious-electronic-questioning-one-more-night-notre-dame">please head over to mgoblog</a>. Topics discussed in part 2 include:<br />
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<ul>
<li>Butt</li>
<li>James Joyce's <i>Ulysses</i>, prevalence of butts within.</li>
<li>The upcoming Game of Thrones novel and it's butt-related content.</li>
<li>A joint game prediction wherein the universe might or might not end. Also there are butts. </li>
<li>I think also maybe some football.</li>
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Enjoy!fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-62217624355305361782014-09-03T22:43:00.000-05:002014-09-03T22:43:16.724-05:00The House Rock Built is Drowning in Babyflesh<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/baby.jpg" width="300" />You may have heard of this thing called the "polar vortex". For the uninitiated, it's a large cyclone of frigid air that, if the jet stream diverts south, can settle down over large metropolitan areas, causing long weeks of subzero temperatures and, in many causes, WIDE-SCALE IDIOPATHIC PREGNANCY AMONG THE WIVES OF PROMINENT BLOGGERS. Nobody know why or how this happens, but a hedge wizard once told me that it has something to do with an ancient curse, and I'm apt to believe him.<br />
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Regardless of the cause, The House Rock Built is up to its ass in babies. Irishoutsider sired a mewling whelp a few months past, and your humble narrator is at DEFCON 1 readiness for the ejection of his second child any minute now. Needless to say, things are loud right now. And busy. And sleepy. And covered in poop. Good lord the poop. So puppets are...<br />
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Puppets are... not cancelled. No, not dead, not by a long shot. Just sidetracked. But not dead.<br />
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The editorial calendar has been tweaked. Weekly shows are sadly not possible, so instead we're going to make a Mid-Season Spectacular that will come out, um, Mid-Season and a Season Finale. To make up for the lack of a constant puppet fix, we will make these extra glorious.<br />
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We thank you for your anticipated coöperation. In the meantime, there might be the occasional smart-ass hot take on the Twitters at @stuffingthepass. Plus, I'm doing my annual Blogjam with Mgoblog, which should be up tomorrow.<br />
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Aside from that, Keep Calm and et cetera et cetera. Go Irish.<br />
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-fightinamish.<br />
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<br />fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-11088351977798868302013-11-24T20:52:00.000-06:002013-11-24T20:52:33.896-06:00Stuffing the Passer - Manball<img align="right" src="http://thehouserockbuilt.com/images/manball.jpg" width="300" />Well, I'm not going to dance around the subject: we're playing Stanford on Saturday, and they are big burly ugly manly manful mantastic men whose brawny mansome manliness put our puny and unmanly manhood to shame. These things are true, and we must accept this inconvenient fact.<br />
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I mean, look at their power running formation (via @edsbs): it's brimming mansomeness out of every manly orifice, just seven metric tuns of gnarled manliness crushing all forms of football life and ushering the glorious resurrection of real football that nearly blinked out of existence when that tea-sipping <a href="http://sketchingbrad.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/Teddy-Roosevelt-riding-a-moose-cool.jpg">moose-dressage-enthusiast</a> dandypants Teddy Roosevelt sissified the game by making muskets and cauldrons of boiling pitch illegal during the run of play. Might as well just slap tutus on the lads and call it "soccer" at that point.<br />
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Anyway, this week the gang embarks on some vigorous manhood training in preparation for the big game. The results are predictably mixed.<br />
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<center>
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/tA2q_-sMTT0" width="640"></iframe><br />
<i>Ow... my self-esteem.</i></center>
fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-23411355946825910452013-10-31T14:22:00.000-05:002013-10-31T14:22:55.567-05:00Stuffing the Passer - Sea Shanty (Remix)<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/puppetservice.jpg" width="300" />So way back in 2009, we decided to help fire up the lads for a big game against the Naval Academy with a <a href="http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2009/11/stuffing-passer-gang-sings-sea-shanty.html">rousing sea shanty</a>. <br />
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The main goal of the project, besides playing with a cardboard sea serpent, was to remind the gang that with just enough willpower, we could will the horrifying 2007 loss to Navy out of existence and pretend that the 44-game winning streak was still alive.<br />
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All things being equal, I think we did a rather good job of driving home that point, and everything was pretty much fine and dandy ever since. Let's take a second to re-watch that wonderful hit from 2009. Such innocent times.<br />
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<br clear="all" /> <br />
<center><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/pX1alEHInvs" width="640"></iframe></center><br />
Well, then reality hit like a ton of bricks, and the Irish dropped two straight to Navy, each more inexplicable than the last. Some think that the insane hubris of the Sea Shanty was responsible for the barrage of red zone turnovers and defenses forgetting how to tackle, and they're probably right.<br />
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At any rate, we thought we'd revisit that wonderful song, and break you off a little preview of the remix, which our cool and awesome DJ friend from London who I assure you is totally real mashed up with our original tracks and some sticky phat beats (I am assured that's what the kids are saying these days). Enjoy.<br />
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<center><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/4eV3lOfVD7A" width="640"></iframe></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-10442850077138434252013-10-23T16:55:00.000-05:002013-10-23T16:55:55.122-05:00Stuffing the Passer - The Tommy Show (Featuring Spencer Hall)<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/nightshow.jpg" width="300" />Thanks for bearing with us through last week's <a href="http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2013/10/stuffing-passer-party-like-its-1988.html">rerun from 1988</a>, it was good to get away from producing a weekly show, and also to see how far we've come production-wise in the last 25 years. <br />
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Today's episode is a very special one indeed, as our dear friend Orson Swindle (née Spencer Hall) from <a href="http://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/">Every Day Should Be Saturday</a> graciously volunteered to be a guest on the Puppet Tommy Rees show, a late night talk and variety show that, in all honesty, is pretty much dreadful and has only stayed on the air the last 20 years because it has a weird niche following among Serbian ultra-nationalists. Anyway, I think Spencer did a great job keeping things lively, as did the man-eating ocelot. Enjoy!<br />
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<center><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/0fIryho_4Tk" width="640"></iframe><br />
<i>Boy, when ol' Johnny Lujak scored a touchdown in '47, he went straight to the sidelines without even stopping to ash his cigarette.</i></center><br />
Oh, and while you're here, why not check out <a href="http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmyWRSdF5QVeGisKp8mlIcqyoZDrY9GU8">Season 5 of Stuffing the Passer</a>? If you like it, drop us a note in the comments, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/houserockbuilt">subscribe on YouTube</a>, or peruse the archives here. Thanks!fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-73645470947433654712013-10-16T19:46:00.000-05:002013-10-16T19:48:15.144-05:00Stuffing the Passer - Party Like It's 1988<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/beach.jpg" />Ahoy, gang. Hopefully you're all enjoying the bye week as much as we are. Bye weeks are a great time to reintroduce yourself to your wife and child, get that haircut and shave you've been putting off for eight months, and give yourself thrice-daily stem cell injections in your liver to try to regrow as much tissue as possible until the next time your team makes you drink yourself half to death. <br />
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Unfortunately, we've been so busy taking care of our honey-do lists that we haven't been able to shoot a new episode for you. Sorry about that. But we care about keeping you entertained, so here's one from the archives: a rerun of one of our favorite episodes of Stuffing the Passer, which originally aired on October 20, 1988. Enjoy!<br />
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<center>
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/59lOvyEb27s" width="640"></iframe><br /><i>I admire your piety, Mr. Zorich.</i></center>
fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-34279166798509809622013-10-04T04:28:00.000-05:002013-10-04T04:28:25.181-05:00Stuffing the Passer - The McGrumpus Filibuster<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/jjlinz.jpg" width="300" />Politics, politics, politics. That's all everyone's talking about these days. So let's put this to rest once and for all: whatever else your political beliefs are, I think we can all come together in a bipartisan fashion and agree that Juan Linz (<a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/monkey-cage/wp/2013/10/03/noted-political-scientist-and-sociologist-juan-linz-has-died/">RIP</a>) has the coolest biography portrait ever. I mean, look at that, I couldn't look that cool if I spent two years at a Shaolin monastery eating raw eggs and practicing the ancient and forbidden arts of looking cool.<br />
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As for his thesis that the bicameral presidential democracy system in America is <a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/wonkblog/wp/2013/10/02/the-shutdown-is-the-constitutions-fault/">an untenable mess incapable of surviving an age of rigorously-enforced partisan polarization</a>, well you're free to believe whatever you want. Just be careful what you say out loud, as his ghost might jump out of your computer monitor and put out his cigarette in your eye. <br />
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With that in mind, enjoy this week's puppet installment about the perils of dysfunctional legislative bodies. I'm not sure where we got the inspiration...<br />
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<center><iframe width="640" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/FmenE6dVdXI" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><BR><i>All of these young folk don't know their way around a finely bruised Manhattan if it bit them on their backsides.</i></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-46098683995157723562013-09-25T01:54:00.000-05:002013-09-25T01:54:31.143-05:00Stuffing the Passer - Wheel in the Sky<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/dabears.jpg" width="400" />Episode 6 is live, gang, and it sort of wraps up the loose threads from the story arc we started the season with. So, yeah, basically it's exactly what I assume this week's finale of Breaking Bad is going to be like: everyone talks out their differences, has a few laughs, and learns a valuable life lesson from a giant talking rat. <br />
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On a related (okay, not really related) note, there's a short snippet of "We Can't Stop" in this episode, and after listening to it a number of times in the course of editing, I realized it's actually a decent song*. I guess I never really gave it a fair shot, so yeah, that's my counterintuitive #slatepitch for the day.<br />
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Okay, enjoy!<br />
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* I was not on drugs while editing**.<br />
** Really.<br />
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<center><iframe width="640" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/N3fE4k6iLiY" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><BR><i>All your trash ends up here, in the sewer.</i></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-74180172459533541292013-09-17T08:06:00.001-05:002013-09-17T08:06:02.771-05:00Stuffing the Passer - The BaptismEnjoy!<br />
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<center><iframe width="640" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/hRg090s3BYk" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><BR><i>Do you reject Saban and all his empty promises?</i></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-81386788810038990252013-09-12T16:32:00.002-05:002013-09-12T20:03:32.415-05:00After Further Reviewing - 4th Quarter Offense Vs. MichiganOkay, sorry for the delays in today's AFR (not in any way affiliated with mgoblog's exquisite <a href="http://mgoblog.com/content/upon-further-review-2013-defense-vs-notre-dame">Upon Further Review series</a>). You know, Ragnorak...<br />
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<center><table style="border: 1px solid #333"><tbody>
<tr> <th bgcolor="#004400"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; text-align: left;">L</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small; text-align: left;">N</span></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">D</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">N</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">D</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">S</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">O F</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">ORM</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">RB</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">TE</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">WR</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">D F</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">ORM</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">T</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">YPE</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">P</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">LAY</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">P</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">LAYER</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">Y</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">ARDS</span></div></th> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">O23</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">10</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Shotgun 3-wide</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">3</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">4-4 Under</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Penalty</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">False Start</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Martin</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">-5</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20">Defense shows pressure.</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">O28</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">15</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Shotgun Empty TE</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">0</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">4</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Okie Zero</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Pass</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Dumpoff</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Jones</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Inc</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">Pressure up the middle forces dreaded rollout, Rees gets rid of it. Would have had nothing even if caught. (TA, N/A) </span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">O28</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">2</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">15</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Shotgun Empty TE</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">0</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">4</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Nickel Over</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Pass</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Middle Screen</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Niklas</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">13</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">M Defense dials up too much heat, big zone underneath the dropping LB's, easy pickup. (CA, 1)</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O15</td> <td>3</td> <td>2</td> <td>Shotgun 4-wide</td> <td>1</td> <td>0</td> <td>4</td> <td>Nickel Even</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>Flash Screen</td> <td>Daniels</td> <td>-2</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">Two defenders in close coverage blow this up before it even gets going. Toss is a little high to do anything, but play is DOA anyway. (MA, 1)</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O17</td> <td>4</td> <td>4</td> <td>Shotgun 3-wide</td> <td>1</td> <td>1</td> <td>3</td> <td>Okie Zero</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>Post</td> <td>Jones</td> <td>Inc</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">M brings the entire earth on a blitz. Right call launching it for Jones in man coverage, but the pressure prevents Rees from stepping into the throw. Somewhere in the distance, a raven caws. The moon has gradually turned blood red during this drive. (IN, 3)</span></td></tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"><td colspan="20"><strong style="background-color: transparent;">Drive Notes:</strong><span style="background-color: transparent;"> Turnover on Downs, 20-34, 14:23 4th Q.</span></td> </tr>
<tr> <th bgcolor="#004400"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; text-align: left;">L</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small; text-align: left;">N</span></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">D</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">N</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">D</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">S</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">O F</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">ORM</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">RB</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">TE</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">WR</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">D F</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">ORM</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">T</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">YPE</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">P</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">LAY</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">P</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">LAYER</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">Y</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">ARDS</span></div></th> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">N48</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">10</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Pistol 3-wide</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td>1</td> <td>3</td> <td>Nickel Even</td> <td>Run</td> <td>Power O</td> <td>Atkinson</td> <td>16</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20">Guard pulls and makes a solid smash block to open up a seam, Atkinson turns on the burners. There is a barely-perceptible earthquake. As crowd noise subsides, we can hear that all of the dogs in the city are barking furiously.</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O36</td> <td>1</td> <td>10</td> <td>Pistol 3-wide</td> <td>1</td> <td>1</td> <td>3</td> <td>Nickel Over</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>Hitch</td> <td>Brown</td> <td>11</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20">Big cushion on Brown, quick-hitter with some yardage afterwards. A fissure opens in the parking lot and belches a geyser of steam behind the south end zone. Ravens begin amassing on top of the press box. (CA, 1)</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O25</td> <td>1</td> <td>10</td> <td>Shotgun Empty TE</td> <td>0</td> <td>1</td> <td>4</td> <td>Nickel Over</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>Corner</td> <td>Jones</td> <td>Inc</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20">Rees rolls the dice on a corner route, just can't pinpoint it because Tommy Rees. Press box is now covered in ravens, Herbstreit shoos some away with a broom so the broadcasters can actually see the action. The linesman notices a strange red pool slowly oozing out of the locker room. (IN, 3) </td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O25</td> <td>2</td> <td>10</td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Shotgun 3-wide</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">3</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Okie One</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Pass</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">TE Out</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Niklas</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">2</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">Can't pick up pressure, Rees flings it out to the flat to take what he can get. A comet blazes across the night sky, bathing the stadium in odd midday light for a big 3rd down play. The linesman now realizes it's a stream of blood flowing from the locker room, and takes a few steps toward the center of the field to keep his shoes dry. (CA, 1)</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">O23</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">3</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">8</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Shotgun Empty TE</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">0</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">4</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Nickel Over</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Pass</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Dig</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Jones</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Inc</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">Timing route blown up by LB making well-timed drop. Play suspended briefly as ten thousand snakes escape from the steam fissure. </span><span style="background-color: transparent;">A raven plucks out Musburger's right eye (consummate pro, he doesn't miss a beat brodcasting). (BR, 2)</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td colspan="20"><strong style="background-color: transparent;">Drive Notes:</strong><span style="background-color: transparent;"> Field Goal, 34-30, 9:30 4th Q. Goes in the books as a 40-yarder, but the goalposts fell over during the snakequake, so all Brindza had to do was kind of roll the ball past the 10 yard line. (+1)</span></td> </tr>
<tr> <th bgcolor="#004400"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; text-align: left;">L</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small; text-align: left;">N</span></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">D</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">N</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">D</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">S</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">O F</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">ORM</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">RB</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">TE</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">WR</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">D F</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">ORM</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">T</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">YPE</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">P</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">LAY</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">P</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">LAYER</span></div></th> <th bgcolor="#004400"><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow;">Y</span><span style="background-color: transparent; color: yellow; font-size: x-small;">ARDS</span></div></th> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">N35</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">10</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Shotgun Empty TE</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">0</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">4</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Nickel Over</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Pass</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Sack</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">N/A</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">-9</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20">Good coverage, line can't hold, Rees can't escape pocket. River of blood now slashing through the southwest corner of the field. The first few reanimated corpses from Arborcrest Cemetary have found their way into the stadium, but pose minimal threat because they're stuck in the line for the bathroom. More to come.</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">N26</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">2</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">19</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Shotgun Empty TE</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">0</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">4</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Nickel Even</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Pass</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Hitch</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Brown</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">10</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">M drops into coverage, Rees makes the right read. Light drizzle of flaming sulfur begins. Brady Hoke briefly catches fire, but seems unperturbed. Everything right of the right hashmark is under the blood river. Musburger has been picked clean to the bones. Can't see Herbstreit, although can barely make out him reciting a muffled rosary on the broadcast. (CA, 1)</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>N36</td> <td>3</td> <td>9</td> <td>Shotgun Empty TE</td> <td>0</td> <td>1</td> <td>400K</td> <td>Nickel Even</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>TE Seam</td> <td>Niklas</td> <td>21</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20">Probably should have been a too many men penalty (R-1), as it appears that the entire Communion of Saints have lined up for Notre Dame here. South half of stadium now completely overrun by walking dead, although they appear neutral vis a vis the football game so I didn't count them in the formation totals. M fortunate Niklas had to steer back toward center of field away from blood lake, otherwise might have been gone (BL+1). (DO, 2)</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O43</td> <td>1</td> <td>10</td> <td>Shotgun Empty TE</td> <td>0</td> <td>1</td> <td>4</td> <td>Zombie Horde</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>In</td> <td>Daniels</td> <td>12</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">Communion of Saints now in heated battle with the Army of the Underworld in the far end zone, so ND back to 11-man formation. Zombies might not technically be partisan but by this point they have formed a wall that, along with the blood lake, is more or less incorporated into M's defensive scheme. Good stop-fade by Daniels, picks up decent yardage before being bitten repeatedly by undead ghouls. Would have liked to see him pick up a few more YAZB. (DO, 2)</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O31</td> <td>1</td> <td>10</td> <td>Shotgun Empty TE</td> <td>0</td> <td>1</td> <td>3.5</td> <td>Zombies Over</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>TE Hitch</td> <td>Niklas</td> <td>11</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20">Communion of saints roundly defeated by Satan. Drat, they would have helped on this drive. Fans in north stands being dragged screaming into maw of hell. Only counted 3.5 receivers, as TJ Jones is huddled in a ball on the far hash writing something. ESPN chyron is blocking the paper, but it looks like it's his last will and testament. Good underneath throw by Tommy. (DO, 2)</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">O20</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">1</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">10</span></td> <td><span style="background-color: transparent;">Just Tommy</span></td> <td>0</td> <td>0</td> <td>0</td> <td>H'fffftth</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>Fade</td> <td>Daniels</td> <td>Inc</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">The earth splits in half right after the snap, swallowing all of ND's offense except Rees (fortunately in shotgun). H'ffffftth the Horrid emerges from the chasm, belching fire. Rees spots Davaris Daniels dangling upside down in one of H'ffffftth's tentacles, but isn't able to thread the needle. Also, H'fffffth has ripped Daniels' arms off. (CA, 3)</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O20</td> <td>2</td> <td>10</td> <td>All Living ND Players</td> <td>13</td> <td>22</td> <td>38</td> <td>Blood Mountain</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>Out</td><td>Jones</td> <td>7</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20">H'ffffth devoured by ten thousand ravens, mercifully, but his death rattle awakens mighty Vulcan, causing a pressure fault that forces a 500-foot cliff of bedrock up between the Irish and the end zone. The blood river's flow is diverted down the narrow canyons of the mountain, causing a flash bloodflood that obliterates all life between the hashes. Rees spots Jones with some space in the flat and makes the quick out. (DO, 2).</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O13</td> <td>3</td> <td>3</td> <td>Trebuchet</td> <td>4</td> <td>12</td> <td>30</td> <td>Grogshabroth</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>Catapult</td> <td>Jones</td> <td>7</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">Not enough time on the clock to take the switchbacks over blood mountain, so the team constructs a hasty trebuchet from the timbers of what used to be Michigan Stadium. Rees hits Jones perfectly in stride after he's launched. Jones appears on a trajectory to land in the end zone, but, gawdammit, Grogshabroth has finally arrived. He swallows Jones in one mighty gulp at the 7 yard line. (DO, 3)</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td>O6</td> <td>1</td> <td>G</td><td>Tommy & Amir</td> <td>0</td> <td>1</td> <td>0</td> <td>Ragnorak</td> <td>Pass</td> <td>Slant</td> <td>Carlisle</td> <td>INT</td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#eee"> <td colspan="20"><span style="background-color: transparent;">Grogshabroth abandons his defensive responsibilities briefly to devour Satan and his armies whole (and does so in, like, no time flat). Towers of flaming sulfur have engulfed everything but about a ten yard circle around the LOS. I think Tommy could feel the pressure of the world ending and sort of rushed this pass, bouncing it off Amir's hands. Countess makes a good read on the deflection, but on the replay it looks like the earth implodes and disintegrates BEFORE he's able to get a foot on the ground (R-1). Total screw job by the refs, but seeing as these are our final seconds on Earth, best not to dwell on it. I hug my wife and baby one last time.</span></td> </tr>
<tr bgcolor="#dfd"> <td colspan="20"><strong style="background-color: transparent;">Drive Notes:</strong><span style="background-color: transparent;"> Interception, 30-41, 1:46 4Q. Goodbye, earth. </span></td> </tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<br />
</center><center style="text-align: left;"><b>So now what?</b></center><center style="text-align: left;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">Well, if you're reading this, it means you were one of the two dozen humans still alive, blown clear of the earth's implosion on the craggy cliffs of what used to be the Flannan Isles of Scotland. I reckon you've got about three or four days left until your asteroid's weak gravity field loses its grip on its thin atmosphere and you all asphyxiate. I'd probably use this time to catch up with Breaking Bad on DVD.</center><center style="text-align: left;"></center><center style="text-align: left;"><b>Why didn't we bring in the fullback to block Grogshabroth?</b></center><center style="text-align: left;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">We don't have a fullback on the roster. Also, Grogshabroth is 800 feet tall with nine horrid mouths full of rows of diamond-sharp teeth. We'd probably have to double him with a tight end/tackle.</center><center style="text-align: left;"></center><center style="text-align: left;"><b>So who's the Heisman frontrunner?</b></center><center style="text-align: left;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">George MacQuaid. He's played one season of rugby at Cambridge in the 1970s. He seems to be the most athletic person still alive.</center><center style="text-align: left;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;"><b>What does it mean for the future?</b></center><center style="text-align: left;"><b><br />
</b></center><center style="text-align: left;">Hopefully one of the chunks that used to be earth will collide with a planet in a habitable zone sometime in the next few million years. If there are some well-preserved microorganisms in some of its air pockets, we might be looking at life in a few billion years and college football a few billion after that. Maybe we'll renew the rivalry then.</center></div>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-47395406697616678342013-09-10T07:22:00.001-05:002013-09-10T07:23:28.617-05:00Stuffing the Passer - The Road to PurdueEnjoy!<br />
<br />
<center><iframe width="640" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/8NF3M8upjas" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-33784529198804394652013-09-05T15:57:00.000-05:002013-09-07T23:47:01.527-05:00Blogjammin' with mgoblog<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/lordg.jpg" width="250" />In many ways, my pre-game chats with <a href="http://www.mgoblog.com/">Brian Cook at mgoblog</a> resemble the rivalry-flavored substance that is the Notre Dame-Michigan series. We never talked to each other at all between 1910 and the 80's. Then we had a few strange, furious, and memorable exchanges of point-blank fire under the <a href="http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2009/09/blogjammin-fightinamish-returns-from.html">creepy gaze of Tom Hammond</a>. Then something something Fielding Yost something something the Klan, yadda yadda yadda, three year hiatus. Now we're back together for one penultimate blogjam before the end of the series (or the End of Days, whichever comes first).<br />
<br />
Typically we dress up in costumes for these things, but this being such an austere event we merely retired to my drawing room with fine cigars while wearing Victorian era suits and overcoats. Also codpieces.<br />
<br />
<a href=http://mgoblog.com/content/vicious-electronic-questioning-2-house-rock-built-returns>Part 1 is over at mgoblog</a>. We pick up the conversation talking about Devin Gardner. I've included the lead-in for context.<br />
<br />
<i>fightinamish</i>: <b>Okay, so now my turn to hold the questioning stick.</b><br />
<blockquote><i>Brian Cook</i>: INQUIRE AWAY</blockquote><img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/merman.gif" width="300" /><b>Right, so Devin Gardner. Tell me about him without using the phrases "rose-scented adonis", "harbinger of all happiness in the world to come", or "timeless, wondrous merman". I know, this will be difficult.</b><br />
<blockquote>You didn't prevent me from comparing him to Vince Young, so he's Vince Young. Except fast! And even more good-looking! And capable of morphing from man to fish in certain situati--right. Hmm. He's an explosive athlete who is too willing to unleash his inner Rex Grossman right now and has fits of inaccuracy. He could be insanely, insanely good; he could be pretty good but way too prone to turnovers. </blockquote><blockquote>One thing about him is his incredible red-zone efficiency. He can throw and scramble and even when he's scrambling he has a knack for flinging balls to receivers who just saw their defenders leave them. Maybe a hidden key. </blockquote><blockquote>And he smells like jasmine.</blockquote><b>.... sorry hold please ...</b> <br />
(<i>Editor's Note: I spend a few minutes cleaning baby vomit off of my shirt.</i>) <br />
<b>... okay, back now. all good ... </b><br />
<b><br />
</b> <b>Right, so that sounds impressive. I guess the question is will the line be able to give him enough time to make flowers bloom in the stadium with the magic of love? I'm not sure if you've heard, but there are some large, strapping gentlemen on the Irish defensive front who would strongly prefer that not happen. </b><br />
<b> <img align="left" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/soon.jpg" width="200" /></b><b>And, just between you and me, they are ill-natured. Hungry and ill-natured.</b><br />
<blockquote>I am aware of these gentlemen, as I was innocently picking flowers around last year at this time when they deprived me of my virtue. I cannot tell you yes or no with certainty, but Michigan's tackles both return and are both rather good at chaperoning. Last year Shembo had some success against Schofield and that will remain an issue, but Notre Dame will have to be careful not to get too eager and vacate lanes, because unlike Denard, Devin is aware that his legs are valid implements even on called passes. Seemed to me like Notre Dame had a number of issues with this against Temple. </blockquote><blockquote>I'm more worried about what Nix might eat in the run game. </blockquote><blockquote>Specifically, I am worried he might eat the run game.</blockquote><b>Yes, Nix got bigger in the offseason, which is something I only have the vaguest understanding of. All I know is when I put my wife, son, and cat in a burlap sack, hoist them over my shoulder, and stand on our bathroom scale (you should try this sometime, it's fun), it reads 0.98 Louis Nix Units. He now has an event horizon. </b><br />
<br />
<center><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/spidersweep.jpg" /><br />
<i>It will be interesting to see if Michigan can run this play successfully.</i></center><blockquote>Our new center is popularly described as "undersized." In context this is adjusted to "possibly nonexistent."</blockquote><b>"A rounding error"</b><br />
<blockquote>Or, <a href="http://www.codecogs.com/eqnedit.php?latex=\lim_{n&space;\to&space;\infty}&space;Center&space;==&space;0" target="_blank"><img src="http://latex.codecogs.com/gif.latex?\lim_{n&space;\to&space;\infty}&space;Center&space;==&space;0" title="\lim_{n \to \infty} Center == 0" /></a></blockquote><b>Well... that is interesting to me. Is that something you think can be schemed around?</b><br />
<blockquote>Michigan's best hope is to run the zone stretch and have him dart around that gentlemen and then, like, hope to exist. </blockquote><blockquote>Nix is pretty nimble for a guy his size but planet-sized DTs can only put up with so much running and whatnot. </blockquote><blockquote>If Michigan can stay on the field, get him moving sideline to sideline, maybe they get to his backup. Who is not Nix. This is important.</blockquote><b> What's the weather forecast? The temp at kickoff on Saturday was poached testicles degrees, and it looked like it affected Big Lou. I think. I'm not sure, I spent the whole second half talking to my dead great great grandfather. </b><br />
<br />
<center><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/prospector.jpg" /><br />
<i>Finbar McGloin Stouffer. Killed in a duel over flapjack recipes, 1852.</i></center><blockquote>A pleasant mid-70s dipping into the 60s late. He should be a happy black hole.</blockquote><b>Maybe you should try tape recording yourself fore one day... </b><br />
<br />
<center><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/tobias.png" /></center><br />
<b> Okay, so Michigan's defense. </b><b>What's the gameplan for containing the only quarterback since 2011 to have scored a rushing touchdown in this series? </b><br />
<b>I mean, Denard was fine and Devin seems talented, but they're no Tommy Rees on the keeper.</b><br />
<blockquote>I see what you did there. I think Michigan will start out playing soft, hoping to get to Rees with four guys (prognosis: iffy, but better than last season) and avoid giving up the big play with either Jarrod Wilson or Courtney Avery stepping in for Kovacs. With Notre Dame's kicking game and seeming lack of redzone offense, bend but don't break seems like the way to go, at least early. </blockquote><blockquote>If Notre Dame starts shredding this, Michigan will have to get more aggressive.</blockquote><b> That seems acceptable. How's the secondary? If Tommy can keep throwing with the accuracy he had against Temple, then he won't be giving them as much help as he has historically.</b><br />
<blockquote>Two guys are back from last year: Taylor (he of the interception not thrown by Michigan but rather caught) and Thomas Gordon (who I don't think ND fans have even a vague memory of). Michigan gets back Blake Countess, losing JT Floyd. Frankly that should be a major upgrade. The worries are twofold: Kovacs needs replacing. Wilson was pretty bad in the bowl game, but had a nice opener; Avery is a converted nickel corner who was supposedly going to start before he had his knee scoped. If disaster strikes, it'll likely be there. </blockquote><blockquote>The other point of potential concern is in the nickel, which Michigan will probably be in a ton of. Michigan folds Countess inside and brings in true freshman sleeper Channing Stribling. He's tall, but he's young. </blockquote><blockquote>I'm worried about explosions there as well. </blockquote><blockquote>Just bits of defensive back cartwheeling out of the stadium, framed in the lights.</blockquote><b>Can any of them catch a 270 pound tight end from behind?</b><br />
<br />
<center><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/rudolphwhy.gif" /><br />
<i>MY GOD THE BLAZING SPEED</i></center><blockquote>YES<br />
maybe</blockquote><b>Think carefully.</b><br />
<blockquote>Cam Gordon now plays defensive end on passing downs by the way. <br />
And does well with it. So... yeah, that was our safety. <br />
But let's not talk about past coaches. This, at least, we can be united in.</blockquote><b>One thing fans of our two programs will always agree on: the desperate need for somebody to invent memory-erasing football roofies.</b><br />
<blockquote>If Lacuna, Inc. was a real thing there would be a line stretching from Houghton to Detroit, and everybody in it would be holding a folder that said "Greg Robinson."</blockquote><center><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/lacuna.jpg" /></center><br />
<b>Erm, ugh. They'd have to open a Robinson-erasing franchise in South Bend too. So should we talk about special teams (grisly and mortifying) or just move to the prediction finale?</b><br />
<blockquote>Actually I think we should talk special teams because Michigan... might not actually be grisly and mortifying. As long as Dennis Norfleet doesn't fumble.</blockquote><b>/norfleet.gif <br />
/norfleet.gif <br />
/norfleet.gif</b><br />
<b><br />
</b> <i>Editor's Note: I typed norfleet.gif like six thousand more times here. We skip ahead to...</i><br />
<b><br />
</b> <b>/norfleet.gif forever.</b><br />
<b><br />
</b> <br />
<center><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><br />
<img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><br />
<img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><br />
<img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><br />
<i>Editor's Note: We've just been notified that is not Norfleet. Fightinamish is currently running around in the backyard sprinklers chanting "Norfleet! Norfleet!" We prefer not to ruin it for him. If you feel the same way, then keep a lid on it, guys.</i></center><blockquote>On the other hand, Notre Dame is playing a kicker at punter and... well, some sort of terror artist at kicker, it seems. </blockquote><blockquote>What happened to that guy? </blockquote><blockquote>He was at 80% for his career!</blockquote><b>I... ugh. Tausch's quacker FG attempt was not pretty, but somebody who knows more about the fine arts of kicking did sort of a frame-by-frame on that and showed that it was just a mechanical mistake planting his foot in the wrong place. I think that can get straightened out, although he does need to attempt his next field goal from the ladies' tees with his pants around his ankles.</b><br />
<br />
<center><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/tauscharg.png" width="550" /></center><blockquote>I don't think the pants thing will help... unless they're Nix's pants. </blockquote><blockquote>It does seem like Michigan has a potentially sizeable advantage here as long as their paleolithic approach to covering punts doesn't burn them. </blockquote><blockquote>You got a returner guy back there?</blockquote><b>YES FINALLY</b><br />
<blockquote>Aw, hamburgers.</blockquote><b>TJ Jones had some sharp-looking returns. I almost thought I was hallucinating again, but my dead great great grandfather said he saw it too.</b><br />
<blockquote>Well, if Michigan doesn't get great hangtime he'll have two guys 20 yards from him as he tries to undo the world. Hurray. At least Norfleet. </blockquote><center><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><br />
<img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/norfleet.gif" width="250" /><br />
<i>Oh, great, you've gone and summoned him again.</i><br />
<i><b>Editor's Note: [sigh]</b></i></center><a name="prediction"></a><blockquote>Okay. Prediction time.</blockquote><b>Right, I was thinking since this game is usually so unpredictable, how about we do something different? We'll make a joint prediction by alternating words one at a time, elegant corpse-style.</b><br />
<blockquote>A capital idea.</blockquote><b>I win the toss and elect to defer. Your text will be in blue, mine in red. Begin:</b><br />
<br />
<h3 style="text-align: center;"><span style="color: #073763;">In </span><span style="color: #660000;">2013</span><span style="color: #073763;">, a</span><span style="color: #660000;">n unheralded</span><span style="color: #073763;"> short </span><span style="color: #660000;">player</span><span style="color: #073763;"> dances </span><span style="color: #660000;">through</span><span style="color: #073763;"> thirteen </span><span style="color: #660000;">defenseless</span><span style="color: #073763;"> flailing </span><span style="color: #660000;">cheerleaders</span><span style="color: #073763;">. Blood </span><span style="color: #660000;">gurgles</span><span style="color: #073763;"> from </span><span style="color: #660000;">the</span><span style="color: #073763;"> Temple </span><span style="color: #660000;">of</span><span style="color: #073763;"> Grogshabroth</span><span style="color: #660000;">, who</span><span style="color: #073763;"> announces </span><span style="color: #660000;">the</span><span style="color: #073763;"> cancellation </span><span style="color: #660000;">of</span><span style="color: #073763;"> Earth</span><span style="color: #660000;">. Victory</span><span style="color: #073763;"> for </span><span style="color: #660000;">none,</span><span style="color: #073763;"> blood </span><span style="color: #660000;">for</span><span style="color: #073763;"> all</span><span style="color: #660000;">.</span></h3><div><span style="color: #660000;"><br />
</span></div><img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/cthulhu.png" width="250" /><b>Period. Outstanding. I'm taking that straight to Vegas.</b><br />
<blockquote>I'm just glad the world ends before the series does.</blockquote><b>Do we have a Ragnorak escape clause in our contract?</b><br />
<blockquote>Not if Bill Martin negotiated it. </blockquote><blockquote>Well, sir, I hope your team drowns in a pile of fetid puppy limbs. </blockquote><b>And I hope superintelligent ape archaeologists find the skeletons of your team in the queue for the bathrooms of a recently-unearthed Michigan Stadium, their fossilized bladders still full and distended.</b><br />
<b><br />
</b> fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-77005791597622690092013-09-03T22:26:00.000-05:002013-09-04T08:06:03.478-05:009 questions about the University of Michigan you were too embarrassed to ask<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/miterr2.jpg" width="550" />Notre Dame and its allies are preparing for a possibly imminent series of football plays against a school called the "University of Michigan", in retaliation for President Hoke's <a href="http://espn.go.com/college-football/story/_/id/9271478/notre-dame-fighting-irish-chickening-michigan-wolverines-rivalry-says-brady-hoke">suspected use of Geneva Convention-violating poultry metaphors</a> against civilians. They've already launched some <a href="http://www.cbssports.com/collegefootball/eye-on-college-football/23433946/kelly-michigan-isnt-a-historic-traditional-rival-for-notre-dame">nasty verbal volleys</a>, but things are likely to get "kinetic" sometime around Saturday night.<br />
<br />
If you found that sentence confusing, or aren't exactly sure why Notre Dame is gearing up for physical competition against the University of Michigan (also sometimes called The Univ of Michi), or even where the Univ of Michi is located, this article is for you. What's happening in An-Urbur (pronounced "Ann Arbor") is really important, but it also can be confusing and difficult to follow for casual Notre Dame fans who only follow their team and their traditional rivals, and as such do not know anything about the Un of Mi (another nickname for the University of Michigan).<br />
<br />
Here, then, are the most basic answers to your most basic questions. First, though, a disclaimer: the University of Michigan is a complicated place. Many things about it (i.e., its exact location, enrollment, fight song, and school colors) are the subject of fierce debate among historians. I'll do my best here to give you a basic background primer.<br />
<br />
<b><span style="color: #990000;">1. What is the University of Michigan?</span></b><br />
<br />
The University of Michigan is a public research institution. It was formed in 1817 by the British as part of reparations mandated by the Treaty of Ghent after their unconditional surrender to the United States following the War of 1812. <br />
<br />
<b><span style="color: #990000;">2. Why with all the fighting?</span></b><br />
<br />
Short answer, the relationship has been fractious since the 19th century, when Notre Dame was colonized by Michigan and run by the Raj, a ruthless proxy dictator. A series of guerrilla uprisings and violent repressions took place over that span, usually in the large enclosed fields on the two campuses. These were bloody affairs, often involving points totals well into the double digits.<br />
<br />
<center>
<img src="http://thehouserockbuilt.com/images/ndmiscores.jpg" /><br />
<i>Oh the humanity.</i></center>
<br />
Following the Paprika Act of 1910, Notre Dame launched a nonviolent popular uprising led by head coach and guru Frank Longman. Following Notre Dame independence, the two schools enjoyed 92 years of peace, never once devolving into on-field football combat to resolve their problems. Tackling and hitting gave way to icy indifference. In fact, both Universities moved their campuses 25 feet further away from the other each year, explaining the now-179 mile gap between them.<br />
<br />
<b><span style="color: #990000;">3. So why are things heating up now?</span></b><br />
<br />
Oh, right. So after nearly a century of peace, the two sides resumed open hostility in 2002 with a series of violent annual skirmishes. Neither side was able to obtain a permanent advantage due to <a href="http://mgoblog.com/content/brady-quinn-heisman">wildly</a> <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vLOtDB1SzSA">amateur</a> <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9orixjAk87A">battlefield tactics</a> on both sides, and by 2012 the conflict had ground into a gruesome and unwatchable stalemate.<br />
<br />
<center>
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="480" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/9orixjAk87A" width="640"></iframe><br />
<i>Exhibit A</i></center>
<br />
Pivoting off of a victory at the Battle of South Bend in 2012, Notre Dame athletic director Jack Swarbrick used his newfound leverage to sue for peace, <a href="http://espn.go.com/college-football/story/_/id/8423552/notre-dame-fighting-irish-opts-series-michigan-wolverines">courageously handing a peace treaty to his counterpart at the University of Michigan on the very field where the battle was fought</a>.<br />
<br />
<b><span style="color: #990000;">4. Why didn't the peace last?</span></b><br />
<br />
As events in America's recent past have shown, it's not that simple to extricate yourself from a decade-long conflict fraught with historical grudges. The treaty calls for a phased withdrawal over the next few years, but that still means both sides will still be around for a few more fighting seasons.<br />
<br />
The obvious question as the cessation of hostilities approaches, though, is what do we tell our last wave of players we send into harm's way? To <a href="http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/John_Kerry">paraphrase the Secretary of State</a>, how exactly do you ask a player to be the last man to get tackled for a mistake?<br />
<br />
<b><span style="color: #990000;">5. I hear a lot about how Russia and Iran both love the University of Michigan. What up with that?</span></b><br />
<br />
Nobody loves the University of Michigan.<br />
<br />
<b><span style="color: #990000;">6. This is all bleak and hopeless. Can we take a music break?</span></b><br />
<br />
According to Wikipedia, Iggy Pop dropped out of the University of Michigan. <br />
<br />
<center>
<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/jQvUBf5l7Vw" width="640"></iframe></center>
<br />
<b><span style="color: #990000;">7. Will dropping bombs on one or both of these teams help?</span></b><br />
<br />
What? No. Why would you think that? <br />
<br />
<b><span style="color: #990000;">8. Are you sure? I feel like blowing something up somewhere would be a good thing.</span></b><br />
<br />
That's... what? No. No. Jeez.<br />
<br />
<b><span style="color: #990000;">9. Hi I have no attention span and so I just scrolled here to the bottom for a summary oh hey look videos of puppets bye bye.</span></b><br />
<br />
Okay, bye. Now that that weirdo's gone, here's a summary:<br />
<ul>
<li>The University of Michigan is a school.</li>
<li>Their nickname is the Wolves or Wolfpack or something.</li>
<li>No matter what you've heard, Vladimir Putin does not like them.</li>
<li>They have a coach, who is rumored to be named Chester Bradyhoke. This is unconfirmed.</li>
<li>Lots of young men with promising futures will get tackled on Saturday, many of who will not get up for several seconds or perhaps even a minute or more.</li>
<li>Violence can only be concealed by a lie, and the lie can only be maintained by violence. (<a href="http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/a/aleksandr_solzhenitsyn.html">A. Solzhenitsyn</a>)<br />
</li>
</ul>
<br />
God help us all.<br />
<br />
(<a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/08/29/9-questions-about-syria-you-were-too-embarrassed-to-ask/">HT</a>)<br />
<br />
<i>Further reading</i>: <a href="http://www.mgoblog.com/">mgoblog</a>, the Free Michigan Army's main digital propaganda arm. fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-74244196759096600402013-09-03T00:35:00.000-05:002013-09-03T00:36:11.687-05:00Stuffing the Passer - In Hoc SignoWell, it looks like the Irish were able to hold off the mighty Temple Owls, even with some Sockface-related shenanigans with the quarterbacking depth chart. This week's episode picks up in the aftermath of the QB1 coup. Enjoy.<br />
<br />
<center><iframe width="640" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/Ptafvam98FU" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-74277090754176359232013-08-26T00:11:00.000-05:002013-08-26T10:51:43.238-05:00Stuffing the Passer - Season 5 Premiere<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/hod.jpg" width="250" /><blockquote><i>This episode is not a "movie". It's not "about" Vietnam. It <b>is</b> Vietnam. It's what it was really like, it's crazy. And the way we made it was very much like the way the Americans were in Vietnam.</i></blockquote><br />
"Should we roll around in it, just once?" irishoutsider asked, nervously eyeing the the pile containing $970 worth of nickels. We still hadn't found out why PayPal had disbursed the proceeds of our <a href="https://rally.org/stuffingthepasser">crowdsourced fundraiser</a> in such a peculiar denomination.<br />
<br />
"Inadvisable. We can't let this go to our heads. Also, I read somewhere that one in five nickels in circulation has traces of the herpes virus."<br />
<br />
"I assume that's untrue."<br />
<br />
<blockquote><i>We were in a poorly-ventilated conference room. There were too many puppets. We had access to too much money, too much equipment. Little by little, we went insane.</i></blockquote><br />
"The memory card is full again," irishoutsider stammered. I had puppets on each of my hands and a chroma-key green mask pulled over my face. He could still see the wild rage in in my eyes. He knew he should not have interrupted me.<br />
<br />
"Put it with the rest," I hissed through gritted teeth.<br />
<br />
He turned and looked at the mountain of memory cards - gigabytes upon terabytes upon petabytes of puppet footage. We had thrown out all of our food to use the pantry for storage. We were starving. Some of the footage was once-in-a-lifetime performances of heart-rending pathos. Some of it was the 16 hours I spent howling like a wolf. Christ only knows what was what -- we never labeled any of them.<br />
<br />
The first print of this episode was 4 days long. We couldn't print it to DVD, so I just mailed our mainframe server to the producers. The next several re-edits trimmed out most of the interpretive dancing and all of the Norse mythology. When I finally got the episode down to 13 and a half minutes, I garroted the guard the studio had posted outside my door and escaped into the moonless night, naked as the day I was born because how the hell else do you work with Final Cut Pro X?<br />
<br />
I found a WiFi signal in that swampy bog and uploaded our beloved monstrosity. It belongs to the ages now. Enjoy.<br />
<br />
<center><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/MYJ4yvgtvkM" width="640"></iframe></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-40825016605332541902013-08-04T23:44:00.000-05:002013-08-05T12:20:08.192-05:00Stuffing The Passer - Ignition NotificationI'm sorry we keep doing this dance every year. You know that dance where the football season ends and then the House Rock Built goes dead silent for seven months, shrinking away into nothingness on your RSS feed, a wraith of a wraith, howling its tuneless silence through the echoey chasms of the nethernet. Perhaps they died. Or got arrested. Or got elected to the United States Senate and had to disassociate themselves with the noxious rantings they wrote on this site.<br />
<br />
<img align="right" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/greyhound.jpg" width="400" />Well, we're back. Perhaps you weren't quite as scared this time around because you heroes did pony up <a href="https://rally.org/stuffingthepasser/donate">970 GLORIOUS DOLLARS</a> to persuade us to keep up the craft. Then again, that wasn't like a legally binding contract or nothin' -- we could have taken that money and blown it on opium and enormous uninformed wagers at unlicensed greyhound tracks in Thailand. And, okay, actually we did. But good news, we hit a glorious superfecta in the 9th race and turned your $970 into a cool 20 grand. We dutifully socked away your original 970 and blew the winnings on absinthe, face tattoos, and ten greyhound puppies that now that I'm thinking about it we totally forgot about and left at our gate at Suvarnabhumi Airport. I'm sure they're doing fine there.<br />
<br />
That said, we've been busy beavers this summer rebuilding our entire puppet laboratory. We now have six COUNT THEM SIX new puppet friends, an elaborate green screen setup, a fancy condenser microphone, and some high-end video editing and 3D software. We even have $18 left over for our, um, legal defense fund. We're going to be riding the very bleeding edge of "permissible use" this season, ladies and gents. Buckle the hell up.<br />
<br />
<center><img src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/fcpx.png" width="300" /><img height="200" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/gscreens.jpg" /></center><br />
Right now, we're working on the "feature length" season premiere, which will be double or maybe triple the length of your typical Stuffing the Passer video. Don't worry, that's not going to be a permanent thing this year, we just thought we'd give you something special to kick off the season with. Principle photography has wrapped on that, and we're in the vigorous editing process. God willing, that will be released the week before the opening game. <br />
<br />
And without further ado, the teaser trailer for season five. Enjoy.<br />
<br />
<center><iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="360" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/LRzYIaAks0I" width="640"></iframe><br />
<i>Because of Obaaaaaaaaamaaaaaaaa!</i></center><br />
<b>UPDATE</b>: Looks like the original upload was not the HD version. My bad, I exported it wrong. I updated it to the higher-res version #learningcurve<br />
fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-24833809946709062442013-01-16T22:36:00.001-06:002013-06-25T23:03:51.745-05:00Stuffing the Passer - SockmentoSo, not sure if any of you remember, but a long long long long long long time ago yesterday the big story surrounding Notre Dame football was Coach Kelly's brief flirtation with the NFL before coming back into the fold in South Bend. I know, I know, some of you might not remember the olden days of yesterday. As usual, feel free to ask the old guy with the eyepatch at your local VFW what the world was like way back on Tuesday.<br />
<br />
Anyway, we made an episode about that. As for that other story (you know, the one that's bigger than the Kennedy Assassination and the Beatles combined), well, we've already <a href=https://twitter.com/stuffingthepass/status/291670236015509504>released our official statement</a>, and we stand by it.<br />
<br />
Enjoy!<br />
<br />
<center><iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/iKjPlLmekH4" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-30082714955884390462012-12-20T00:24:00.001-06:002013-06-27T23:02:15.643-05:00Stuffing the Passer - Tinker Tailor Soldier Sockface<iframe align="right" height="251" scrolling="no" src="https://rally.org/causes/huamBg51kod/donation_meter?name=Dig%20deep%20for%20the%20cause.&goal=850.00&type=amount_raised&style=dark" style="border-bottom-style: none; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; border-left-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-top-style: none; border-width: initial; overflow-x: hidden; overflow-y: hidden;" width="300"></iframe><br />
So, first of all, you people are all heroes.<br />
<br />
If you haven't heard, the <a href="https://rally.org/stuffingthepasser">Stuffing the Passer pledge drive obliterated its goal on day 4</a>. That is, like, mind-blowingly incredible. We hemmed and hawed for a good long time about our fundraising target and worried about whether it was overambitious. So much for that!<br />
<br />
We'll keep you updated on our capital improvements over the offseason once the dust settles, but needless to say the puppets are going to be in fighting trim come next season. We're really touched by the outpouring of support, and by how well this crowdfunding approach has gone. We're going to sort of treat this like Muppet Public Radio from here on out, working hard to produce some entertaining content for you fine people free of charge and advertisement-free and rely on the selfless kindness of our viewers to pitch into the tip jar now and again to keep our basic operating costs covered.<br />
<br />
Programming note: we'll be on hiatus through the holiday season and on lockdown for the title game, gnawing our fingers and toes down to stubs in anxiety. After a week of R&R post-championship game, we'll bring you the season finale, which will consist largely of the lines you submitted in the donation drive. So, if you donated $25 or more and have not e-mailed your line to houserockbuilt-at-gmail-dot-com, be sure to send that over by let's say the Saturday after the championship game. Remember, there was some kind of error in the form, so if you typed your line into the box on the donation form, it did not get to us.<br />
<br />
And with that, puppets:<br />
<br />
<center><iframe width="640" height="360" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/-2LU1HdUNB8?list=UUQUUC9Lqn7J9_ZJqWWGEYgw" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br />
<i>What? Oh, no, this? This is for... nutrition. Yeah.</i></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-51888201946215398732012-12-10T00:28:00.003-06:002012-12-10T12:29:26.157-06:00Stuffing the Passer - Pledge DriveSo, first puppets...<br />
<br />
<center><iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/698HR-PBC7U" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><br />
<i>Hi iCarly!!</i></center><br />
Now for the real stuff. Gang, fightinamish here. I'm loath to do this, because I'm sure you're all being bombarded on all sides by friends and acquaintances looking to take advantage of your inflated feelings of brotherhood and goodwill toward men in this holiday season and beg you for money for their non-profit, charity, bail, or tattoo removal. Nevertheless, we're opening up shop for the first ever HRB/Stuffing the Passer pledge drive to help keep delivering idiosyncratic <i>sui generis</i> entertainment to you fine folks. Between now and the title game, we're hoping to raise funds to keep this bird flying at our fundraising site: <a href="http://rally.org/stuffingthepasser">http://rally.org/stuffingthepasser</a><br />
<br />
<center><iframe height="251" scrolling="no" src="https://rally.org/causes/huamBg51kod/donation_meter?name=Dig%20deep%20for%20the%20cause.&goal=850.00&type=amount_raised&style=dark" style="border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; overflow-x: hidden; overflow-y: hidden;" width="300"></iframe></center><br />
Many of you have enjoyed four jam-packed seasons of nearly-weekly Stuffing the Passer episodes, and some of you have even been around long enough to know that the House Rock Built has been blogging at varying degrees of torrid enthusiasm for seven and a half years now, wriggling its gasping protoplasmic corpus onto the sandy shores of the blogosphere in 2005 after a late-night realization that Purdue's coaching staff had an incredible and unholy arsenal of mustaches and <a href=http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2005/09/purdue-scouting-report.html>GOD DAMMIT SOMEONE HAD TO ALERT THE WORLD</a>.<br />
<br />
Since then I, along with the priceless if maybe sometimes elusive help of my loyal co-defendant irishoutsider, have taken so much joy out of lobbing our brain farts in your general direction and seeing our weird brand of humor resonate with some kindred spirits out in internet world. You may have noticed that in those seven and a half years, there has never been any advertising on this page (or any updates to the design -- urk! Sorry! Going to fix that this offseason), save for a few months when I tried out Google Ads, which I took down after I realized that I wasn't in this for the dollar a month I netted in royalties at the expense of mangling the layout of the page. The thrill was in making content, connecting with readers, and the <a href=http://houserockbuilt.blogspot.com/2006/03/blog-ifesto.html>cool cachet of amateurism that makes this whole subculture awesome</a>.<br />
<br />
But now looking forward to next season, we've come to the realization that we need to make some capital upgrades if we're going to keep delivering the puppet fun that we feel you all richly deserve. Our camera records on honest-to-god video cassette tape (younger viewers, ask your grandfather or the old guy with the eypatch at the VFW what those are) and now squeaks like a bastard thanks to a worn out servo or whatnot. Also, our creative ambition and vision has overtaken our current editing software capability. I'd rather not tell you what a tragically pointless Herculean labor it was to create <a href=http://youtu.be/IGHEAh_2Hak?t=2m1s>this split-screen effect in a ten-second gag</a> on free pre-bundled editing software, but it was insanity. Our viewers deserved that joke, though, so I soldiered through. But, in the interest of delivering that in the future, we need to go semi-professional for our software needs.<br />
<br />
Beyond that, we're hoping to get a basic green screen so we can actually have episodes in places other than bedrooms and bathrooms, and if there's any money left, an extra puppet or two wouldn't hurt. Anyway, I know it's a hassle, but we wouldn't be asking if we didn't think it was worth it to make sure we're giving you the very best we have to offer. Anything you have to offer is appreciated: a dollar, a penny, a rotting crate of Kalishnikovs, anything. We'll make good use of any of the lawyers, guns, or money you send our way. Thanks for sharing these seven years with us, go Irish, and HEY WAIT WHAT HAPPENED WE'RE GOING TO THE NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIP!<br />
<br />
<center><iframe height="251" scrolling="no" src="https://rally.org/causes/huamBg51kod/donation_meter?name=Dig%20deep%20for%20the%20cause.&goal=850.00&type=amount_raised&style=dark" style="border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; border-image: initial; overflow-x: hidden; overflow-y: hidden;" width="300"></iframe></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-13284909542134045572012-11-29T00:29:00.000-06:002012-11-29T00:29:13.875-06:00Stuffing the Passer - Tuesdays With MantiIt's been a long week, gang. We've mostly been freebasing pixie sticks since the fourth quarter of the USC game, so things are a little fuzzy right now. We'll spare you some reading and get right down to the puppets.<br />
<br />
On a related note, the Stuffing the Passer Annual Fund will begin its pledge drive next week. Keep your eyes peeled and we'll let you know our business plans (sneak preview: better editing software, a green screen, more puppets, and drugs... precious, precious drugs) and the magnificent gifts in store for you if you choose to be a sponsor.<br />
<br />
Be cool everybody. Catch you in Miami.<br />
<br />
<center><iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/EXSn8kAcDEQ" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe><BR><i>Oh thank god. That was about to get lascivious.</i></center>fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16632280.post-69526912935398205652012-11-14T23:03:00.000-06:002012-11-14T23:04:45.446-06:00Stuffing the Passer - The Mission<img align="left" src="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/laserdisc.jpg" width="300" />At some point in my childhood, my father came home with an enormous box. Barely able to conceal his delight, he informed me that he held in his arms a small chunk of the future - 26 pounds of the sacred covenant of the sustenance, sufficiency, joy, and leisure that was promised us by this new era of technology. It was a Laserdisc player. I'm not sure how the age demographics skew on this blog (<a href="http://www.thehouserockbuilt.com/images/voterage.jpg">exit polling is an inexact science</a>), but you are entirely forgiven if you have no idea what a Laserdisc is if you didn't happen to own a karaoke bar in the 1990's. See, kids, it was one of the gruesome victims of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Format_war">format wars</a>, and now currently resides in a shallow grave alongside the SCSI cable, the Betamax, and <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_gauge">wide-gauge railroad ties</a>.<br />
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The thing is, in many ways these historical losers were superior to the foes that vanquished them (except for Laserdiscs. God, those sucked in every possible way). Often, the winning format just won the "ground game" through relentless PR campaigns or, more often than not, some <a href="http://deathpenalty.procon.org/view.resource.php?resourceID=003749">INSANE PSYCHOPATH ELECTROCUTING ELEPHANTS</a> (although, ultimately, Edison's victories were short-lived and now your whole house runs on Nikola Tesla's pachydermicidal alternating current).<br />
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What I'm getting at is that while the old Notre Dame Betamax cassette might be big, drab, clunky, and uglier than a rhincerous' ass, there are some <a href="http://ndfootball.wordpress.com/2012/11/14/drive-charting-the-best-defense-in-the-nation/">very compelling numbers</a> that indicate maybe it's the rational, if not the sexiest, contendor for format war champ. What I'm trying to say is that OREGON AND KANSAS STATE MURDER ELEPHANTS WITH ALTERNATING CURRENT AND SHOULD BE BANNED FROM FOOTBALL FOREVER. Hopefully I made that clear.<br />
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Okay, puppets.<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="allowfullscreen" frameborder="0" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/6DlRxvSrWpA" width="560"></iframe><br />
<i>Lies from the pit of Beelzebub propagated to deprive us of our glory...</i></center>
fightinamishhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14244085257460045677noreply@blogger.com