Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Stuffing the Passer - Coming to Your City

There's nothing quite like having ESPN's College Gameday on campus. I for one like the whole concept of not settling for just having a big, important, and exciting football game -- why not just go for broke and bring the whole freaking circus along for the ride?

Of course, the Gameday that we're used to watching today with its crowds, sarcastic signs, and weird mascot head rituals is just a faint shadow of what it used to be, back in the glory days. Of course, I'm talking about the 1920s, when ESPN was just a tin can in New York and one in LA with a 2,700 mile long stretch of twine connecting them.

Yep, back then Fibber McGee and Buster Keaton would sound out rollicking telegraphs from a plywood stage built outside of the stadium where the game of the week was playing, which was actually not very entertaining for anyone. In fact, it has never been confirmed that anyone actually ever received or deciphered their transmissions. Recent scholarship has shown that during the course of the show they almost never actually sent any telegraphs -- most of their time was spent getting staggering drunk and punching immigrants. It was amazing.

Of course, then vaudeville came around and nobody wanted to decode morse code transmissions from outside of football stadiums anymore when they had the option of watching a bawdy puppet show or human cannonball or whatever the hell the kids are into these days. Not surprisingly, the entire world has gone to shit since then.

Allright, puppets.

Well this... this is abstruse.