D&D: Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?

There's been a lot of hullaballoo about Joe Montana's conspicuous absence from the Super Bowl, and frankly it's getting ridiculous. It seems like the angry mobs are demanding an explanation for why he wasn't there despite his deep lifetime obligation to the NFL blah blah blah. In the absence of any definite excuse from the Comeback Kid, some rumors have popped up that JoeMo can't cook without the dough, and that he wouldn't do the dance without a pocketfull of straight cash, homey. It seems much more likely that either he just didn't want to do it or he was suspicious that the invitors had ulterior motives for his visit. All three explanations are equally plausible, we'll let you decide.

(click for comic strip)