Tuesday, September 09, 2008

A Brief Treatise on Jimmy Clausen's New Hairdo

Allright, we've all seen it. Somehow, deep under the radar, the golden boy at Notre Dame decided to grow a profoundly absurd new hairdo for all the world to see. Now before anyone gets hasty and mislabels the new 'do, it's important to get it straight that it is not a mullet. It clearly violates the "business in front, party in the back" ethos of the mullet, as it is "party everywhere". So, what do you call the new look for 2008?

Simple: hockey hair. The wild, stringy locks and flowing mane protruding from the helmet has been an iconic look in hockey for nearly 80 years, and has graced the domes of athletic legends like Dennis Potvin, Guy LaFleur, Brian Engblom, and yes, even The Great One Himself. So while people may laugh at his absurd hair, if you slap a Canadiens jersey and a handlebar mustache on him and change his name to Jacques Clauseneaux, it all looks perfectly natural.

Car ton bras sait porter l'épée, Il sait porter la croix!

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