You're All So Ripe for Parody

If you've never visited The Dugout, you've probably noticed a vast emptiness in your life. It's a hilarious website that posts fictional Instant Messenger conversations between baseball players, but the true genius of the entire site is the fake "screennames" they come up with for the players. Some are obvious (Ian Snell is "OohThatSnell"), while some require a bit more thinking (Ken Griffey, Jr. is "Elijah_Prince", for Samuel L. Jackson's injury-prone character in "Unbreakable"), but all of them are quite hilarious.

This year's Blue Gold game served as an inspiration for the House Rock Built, as well as several drunken companions (namely Irish Outsider) trying to come up with maximally-humorous screen names for this year's team. Some were funny, some weren't, but the entire exercise left us quite entertained for the duration of the rather boring game. For your enjoyment, I've put together the greatest hits of that drunken afternoon. Any other suggestions? Leave them in the comments. It might be a good idea to remember these, as there's a pretty good chance I'll refer to these players almost exclusively by these names throughout the rest of the season.

James Aldridge	AldridgeThatEndsDridge	Joe Brockington	Brock_The_Casbah
Evan Sharpley	a_scanner_sharpley	George West	George_By_Georgewest
Konrad Reuland	der_Konradssar	D.J. Hord	HordHaveMercy
Dan Wenger	Wenger_Chunger	David Grimes	GrimesWithOrange
Asaph Schwapp	Wife_Schwapping	Will Yeatman	Cannibals_Yeatman
Luke Schmidt	SchmidtHappens	Jimmy Clausen	JC_Superstar