Sunday, November 20, 2005

Dink & Dunk, Week 12

Wink Dinkins and Bud Dunkowitz are classically-trained journalists who love fine Scotch, taking your girlfriend to the Seventh Flo', and Pat Hill's mustache.

It's a Dawg's Life
Well, it was a rough week to be a Dawg. While classically a symbol of stout, proud, Anglo-steadfastness, this week the English Bulldog symbolized hearbreak and agonizing failure.

How They Fared
Final Score

Mississippi State
Suffered a 34-point drubbing at the hands of basement co-habitant Arkansas. By the transitive property, Southern Cal would beat these Dawgs by 90, as they themselves put a 56 point licking on the Razorbacks.
44-10, Arkansas

Handsome Dan
The lads from New Haven had countless opportunities to put a victory in The Game in the bag, but squandered every single chance. Three times in overtime, they turned the ball over, until Harvard graciously put us all out of our misery and ended the game with a walkoff touchdown.
30-24, Harvard (3OT)

Fresno State
The Dawgs put up a heck of a fight against the top-ranked squad in the country, but when it comes right down to it, there's not much to do when one individual takes matters into his own hands and wins the game all by himself. That person, of course, was Fresno State quarterback Paul Pinegar. They should build him a shrine in USC's trophy room.
50-42, Southern Cal

For yet another year, Gonzaga did not play anybody on rivalry week, as they have no rivals. Also, they have no football team.

Many congratulations to Uga, the only Dawg who escaped this weekend with a win. Additionally, take a look at the sheer futility of the Havard and Yale overtime bout. In six possessions, only six total points were scored. Yes, in 1AA, they start from the 25, not their own goal line.

Yale: Fumble on the first play
Harvard: Missed FG
Harvard: Interception
Yale: Fumble inside the 10 yard line
Yale: Interception on the first play by the Harvard Nose Tackle
Harvard: Mercifully ends the game with a touchdown.

Mustache of the Century
Pat. Hill. Nuff said. I love this mustache. Love it love it love it. I love it. Oh how I love it. I love it ever so much.
I don't know if he's about to coach a football game or give me a tatto, and frankly I could care less. Do what you want, Pat Hill. I love this stache. Also, were these two separated at birth?

Phil, we hardly knew ye
A moment of silence for the Tennessee season.
We shall also commence massive self-flagellation for saying that Vandy was a waste of a team in an, ahem, previous post on this blog. I love Vandy. Vanderbilt toppled an admittedly reeling and lifeless Tennessee team, but also were robbed of a victory against Florida, and played LSU a lot closer than the score would indicate. On paper, you can make their season look pretty bad, but maybe, just maybe, there's an indication of something greater than their won-loss record. Godspeed, Commodores

The Last Word...
And on a personal note, the House Rock Built's chief correspondant finally ended a four game losing streak while attending games at Notre Dame stadium. After witnessing the travesties of Purdue '04, Pitt '04, Michigan State '05, and USC '05, everyone in the world was more or less convinced it was his fault. We're all glad to see it wasn't.
At the end of the first quarter, with the Irish trailing, I was surrounded by 30 ushers and security personell, who threatened to rough me up and ban me for life if the team didn't turn it around quickly. Thanks for bailing me out, Charlie. I owe you one.

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