This Just In

By George, Notre Dame just received some assistance from, I promise you, the absolute unlikeliest of heroes. Two of the darker aspects of the last decades' futility have been somewhat alleviated... in a sense, at least. In the backwaters of Atlanta, a report from the NCAA has been released that have great implications on Notre Dame's reclaimation of the all-time winning percentage and also the decade-plus bowl game winless streak.

You see, one of the conditions of the NCAA's reaming of Georgia Tech is a forefeit of their bowl wins from their days of debauchery. One of those bowl wins, which I'm sure most of you have all but erased from your memory, was the 1999 Gator Bowl, where the George O'Leary-led Ramblin' Wreck defeated Bob Davie's squad to the tune of 35-28. Not only does this forfeit change Notre Dame's 12 year bowl drought to a more respectable six year drought, look at what havoc it causes in the race to reclaim the all-time winning percentage.

Before
Team	Wins	Losses	Ties	Percentage
Michigan	849	278	36	.74548
Notre Dame	809	265	42	.74372

Now, if you change that Gator Bowl loss to a win, you get...

After
Team	Wins	Losses	Ties	Percentage
Michigan	849	278	36	.74548
Notre Dame	810	264	42	.74462

Now, look what voodoo happens if Michigan loses to Ohio State and Notre Dame romps over Syracuse this weekend.

OSU beats UM, ND beats Syracuse
Team	Wins	Losses	Ties	Percentage
Notre Dame	811	264	42	.7448522
Michigan	849	279	36	.7448453

Great heavenly day in the morning! Spread the word everyone.