Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Off the Southern California!

Well, I'm heading out to SoCal today for some turkey, some fun, and then... then, my friends... bloody vengeance. I'll try to do some more posting, but it's going to be dodgy as I bounce around from place to place. At any rate, those of you watching the game at home should keep an eye on the field in the postgame handshake, because when the Irish win, I'm going to storm the field, steal Traveler, and joyride around the streets of Los Angeles a la Marshawn Lynch, knocking over USC fans and flinging horse manure at the non-believers. Glory. Stone. Rack me, I'm out.

Coccyges heal, glory is forever. Dangerous is nothing.

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At 12:01 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

". . . because when the Irish win . . ."

ouch, nothing worse than cursing yourself

At 12:34 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Only gonna get worse for the Domers with all those seniors going. Will be sweet to see that 50-3 score up on the scoreboard in South Bend next year.

At 12:44 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Any questions?

Conquest Chronicles

At 12:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...


Sorry. Watching you Domers get exposed as the MOST OVERRATED PROGRAM in D1 is always funny.

At 12:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't think all the seniors leaving will be a big deal for ND. Look at USC, who plays all kinds of kids.

Oh, wait, they can do that because the good players want to play at USC.

ND is screwed. Maybe they can take some grafts off of Weis' breasts and play them instead. Talk about your run stuffers.

At 6:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

On the bright side, I suppose the whole world now knows Dwayne Jarret got an 820 on his SATs. Dumbass kids.

At 7:35 PM, Anonymous j.j. said...

Notre Dame fans: can use proper grammar and spell correctly...learned something at a $30+-thousand school
USC fans: further prove they're stuck-up assholes by showing their private education didn't even teach them to speak English.

Notre Dame players: forced to go to class and earn their degrees to some extent
USC players: Chauncey Washington and Matt 'Tiny (Ballroom) Dancer' Leinart

ND cheerleaders: smarter than least we can say that
USC Song Girls: hot as hell, but obviously stupid (Go Vince Young!!!)

Charlie WeiƟ' website: redirects to his daughter's charity.
Pete Carroll's website: shows what a pompous douchebag he is.

ND's guests: Jerome Bettis and Raghib Ismail
USC's guests: OJ and Snoop

At 7:39 PM, Anonymous j.j. said...

Oh, and by the way...I could not be more bitter after suffering through that game.

At 9:34 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Ah, the classic "our education SOOOO much harder than yours" excuse. Honestly, the entire nation does not give a fuck that you have some academic requirements and does not view it as a valid excuse. Man up and accept that you've twice been absolutely dominated by teams with superior talent and superior gameplans.

And am I the only one who has noticed that Tommy Z horse collars players with the frequency of Roy Williams, the horse collar king?

At 9:59 PM, Anonymous mike said...

am i the only one who has noticed that horse collar tackles are 100% legal in college?
no sudden death overtime either, fyi.

At 12:49 AM, Anonymous Tommy O said...

whew! the trolls are out tonight!!

i do have to laugh at how Jarret considers the wins against notre dame some sort of vindication for being rejected on academic standards...sorry buddy...820 SATs is literally just +20 points more than you get for putting your name on the paper. i would normally hold back from making fun, but he brought that publicity to himself..

that said we got spanked. as with the michigan game, i feel like this one could have been a LOT closer (*COUGH*Droppedpasses)..but also just like the UM game, what happened happened and in the end it's unfortunate we weren't the better team.

The good news? our only losses this year are against #2 and #3 in the current BCS standings. That's not gawdawful.

The bad news? Other than #22 GaTech, we've yet to beat anybody of true significance this year. A BCS matchup would likely give us Michigan or Florida. Both would be signiture wins on the season but i'm now wary of playing these teams and personally hope we don't go BCS so we can get a damn bowl victory.

At 11:06 AM, Anonymous ProtonJockey said...

After that charlie foxtrot, all I have to say is: USC - good football, #$&*@y place.

After spending a weekend in the vicinity of USC, I've never appreciated the mulletted South Bend townies so much in my life.

At 12:16 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Checking the latest US News and World Report rankings of U.S. universities:

#20 Notre Dame
#27 USC

Not much of a difference there. How about this idea that Notre Dame graduates do better than USC graduates? One way to measure success is by alumni giving. Here is the fundraising for each university in 2005 taken from the Chronicle of Higher Education:

Notre Dame -- $115 million
USC -- $331 million

And here is a reckoning of the total endowment for each school, taken from

Notre Dame -- $3.65 billion (#16 overall)
USC -- $2.75 billion (#20 overall)

So sorry, Domers, but time to get over the notion that Old Notre Dame is heads and shoulders above of USC academically.

At 1:02 PM, Anonymous jb said...

If Notre Dame were in the Big Ten, they'd be #4 and headed to the Outback Bowl at best. I wish that conference would stop subsidizing that outrageously overrated program whose biggest win under Charlie Weis was against the worst Michigan team in 20 years.

At 2:04 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

anon i have no doubt that USC is a fine school--i say that with no sarcasm. however, it says something that they're admitting football players with the stats that jarrett has. notre dame prides itself on taking the term "student-athlete" seriously. so while i fully admit the old "well our school is tougher than their school" argument doesn't fly as well with you (and UMichigan), the point was with your football team.

oh. and comparing alumni giving stats just reinforces the stereotype of SC as a "mommy and daddy's club" for its students.

At 2:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, and Tony Rice was a sterling example of a deserving student coming out of high school? Let's face it, even ND will make an exception for an athelete that they think they can get them through and keep them eligible. Or are you just going to blame that on Lou Holtz?

At 3:12 PM, Anonymous AllWhoYonder said...

you love to hate ND, don't you? But you're talking about us, so at least we know you care...

At 3:25 PM, Blogger timugen said...

Comparing gross alumni donations is ridiculous as USC dwarfs ND in size. When you have more alumni, you are going to get more money.

Actually, if you really want to look at it, USC total enrollment is about 32,000 while ND's is about 11,000. Roughly three times the enrollment but only twice the alumni donations. Of course you failed to mention that because it actually contradicts your premise.

At 5:30 PM, Anonymous ProtonJockey said...

Actually, it doesn't contradict the premise, which was that the two are similar in stats. What does contradict it is the stats you can't chalk up so easily (because the Princeton Review doesn't chronicle them and you won't easily find them online).

For instance, private schools like USC and Yale are willing to sit idely by while the neighborhoods around the school degenerate into complete poverty. Yale even put up a new fence to keep out the extra rif-raf. ND invests tens of millions of dollars a year in local charities to prevent that from happening, which is why you don't have to dodge bullets to see ND play at home.

At 9:33 PM, Anonymous jb said...

You just have to dodge errant, overthrown passes.

At least Jimmy Clausen will win four Heismans, right? I mean, as long as his jewelry doesn't weigh him down.

At 12:18 AM, Blogger JTE said...

Talking about their endowments and graduation rates and philanthropic activities is what schools do after their football team loses to their rival 44-24.

At 1:11 AM, Blogger Crazy Tom said...

Hey, jb... "If Notre Dame were in the Big Ten, they'd be #4..."

well, if ND were in the Big Ten, this would be considered a successful season. ND being ND, we're 10-2, and people are pissed. tOSU, UM, etc... they'd all LOVE 10-2 as long as they won their little crappy conference.

At 10:52 AM, Anonymous Trojan Pride said...

Ummm .... Tom ....

When five of your 10 wins come against such programs as Navy, Air Force, Fucla, Mich State, and Army, you really shouldn't brag.

At 10:56 AM, Anonymous Trojan Pride said...

Oops! Sorry Tom, I forgot to add the accomplishment of wins against Stanford and North Carolina!

Now thats a run of seven wins any D2 or High School team would be proud of.

At 3:14 PM, Anonymous pellee said...

Yeah, because OSU and Michigan's wins against Indiana, Northwestern, and the MAC are SO impressive. Get over yourself. Everyone is overrated and this isn't a "You beat so I beat" system, nor should it be.

At 1:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

tommy o, in fact, you're wrong.

under the old sat test jarrett took (with a max scaled score 1600), 400 would technically be the lowest score possible, although even that is misleading. the college board doesn't score sections lower than 200 (the scale per section is 200 to 800 points). 820 isn't a stellar score, but it's a lot better than "literally +20 points more than you get for putting your name on the paper" - it's +420 points more.

At 6:19 AM, Blogger gwzimm said...

Old FUCLA looked pretty good to me this past Saturday. Too bad for USC...maybe OJ should have suited up. He could knife somebody in the pileup


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