Tuesday, December 12, 2006

The House Rock Built is Appealing for a Ruling

Allright, readers, I need your help to provide a ruling on the field. So in August I hosted the preseason blogpoll roundtable, and came out guns blazing against people who overrated Arkansas. Read:

Personally, I think that all of these people who voted Arkansas high in the poll (two people put them as high as 13!) are suckers that fell for a big joke that Phil Steele has played on the world. All of you overeducated dorks who bought and have ingested every word of Phil Steele's 2006 college football guide (hey, I'm guilty too) saw that Steele put the Hogs at #13 in his preseason poll, which I am convinced is either a typo or a prank to see how many bloggers he can fool.**
And if you followed the double-asterisk down to the bottom of the post, you would see this additional verbiage tacked on:
** Uh, since I've gone on record saying that, I suppose I should take some accountability. I propose that if the Hogs end up ranked 13 or higher at the end of the season, I will post a picture of myself painted red wearing nothing but Razorbacks boxers.
Wager made, verbal contract enforceable, yadda yadda yadda. The problem is, however, that I was a little bit ambiguous in my choice of words. Does "end of the season" mean "end of the regular season"? In that case I have already lost the bet, woe is me. Or do I still have a chance to win the bet if the Hogs should fall in their bowl game? In the interest of fair play, I'm turning it over to the readers to decide. Cast your vote in the comments. In one week, I will comply with the majority. Just remember to vote in accordance to your interpretation of the Constitution, not out of some personal desire to see my somewhat-spoon-chested body on the internet.

UPDATE: So far, "after the bowl" is leading 18-5. Go Badgers. For the love of God, go Badgers.

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33 Comments:

At 12:51 AM, Anonymous captaineclectic said...

Season ain't over yet. But the Razorbacks are gonna smoke Wisconsin, so you're screwed either way.

 
At 1:21 AM, Anonymous Kyle said...

I concur with ^^

 
At 2:23 AM, Anonymous Dick said...

Season's over, you lost. (As an ND student from the great state of Arkansas, I'm just happy to finally have a chance to tell someone to shove it.) But the guy above is right, the Hogs are going to smoke Wisconsin - so you're toast anyway.

 
At 4:28 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

You haven't lost the bet yet because the football season isn't over. The 'regular' season is over, but we are still playing college football, folks. Besides, every pre-season prediction is made in reference to the National Championship (after the bowl games), not to the end of the 12 game season. That is, no one crows about making the pre-season pick for number one until the final game is over.

I have to be honest . . . I am impressed with your integrity. You really are going to go through with this bet if you lose? No one expects people to actually fulfill these kinds of bets. It's hyperbole and made in the interest of good blogging.

After all, do your readers actually think you believe Teddy Ruxpin or H. R. Puffnstuf would make a better head coach at Michigan State than John L. Smith? Do your readers actually think your car was recently torched in LA? Do they actually think you believe Pete Carroll is an loud-mouth, narcissistic, megalomaniac? Well, . . . maybe we all have reason to believe that last one. But anyway, I think a good lawyer may get you off with the public shame for 'not knowing anything about football.'

 
At 6:21 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

seasons over fella take it off and put them on

 
At 7:02 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Season's not over until a champion is named.

 
At 7:20 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeaaaaaah...about that. Your ticket is punched. Time for the red paint!

 
At 7:41 AM, Anonymous jeremy said...

1. Season's not over.

2. Where the hell has Howard Schnellenberger gone? Is he off breastfeeding John Madden and punching holes in cows just to see what's coming up the road?

 
At 7:43 AM, Blogger Sean H. said...

In the interest of not having my eye ball scarred, the season is not over.

Go Badgers!

 
At 7:55 AM, Anonymous bullfrog said...

I have anti-desire to see you in boxers. The season continues, and you should calculate the final ranking averaged with that of the final ranking of the Arkansas basketball team, as well.

 
At 8:36 AM, Anonymous Ted said...

gotta be after the bowl game, no one says a program finished in the top ten in any said year unless its the END result.

 
At 8:45 AM, Anonymous anohioirish said...

The season isn't over yet. Although I don't really like the odds of Wisconsin beating Arkansas.

 
At 8:49 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The season isn't over yet. Hogs are going to roll though, so you might as well get ready.

As to the anonymous above about Teddy Ruxpin being better than Johnelle. I think we all believe that to be true. He couldn't be any worse.

 
At 9:07 AM, Blogger jonese said...

sorry dude but i think by season you where thinkign regular season, especially since you didn't think they get past 13 and probably not even go to a bowl game :)

 
At 9:52 AM, Anonymous canuck said...

The season is over. But you did not say how big the boxers were or that you would actually paint yourself. Photoshop is your only out.

 
At 10:16 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

are there still games yet to be played? Yes? Then the season is not over.

 
At 10:37 AM, Blogger John Harkins said...

after the bowl game

 
At 10:40 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

After the bowl season. I would interpret "end of season" rankings to mean final rankings after all bowl games were played.

 
At 10:40 AM, Anonymous Mr. Wednesday said...

After the bowl game.

 
At 10:55 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

After the bowl game. Mostly for the sake of the blogging world's eyes, but also because after the bowls are over and the final polls come out, nobody will refer to anybody by their rank from before the bowls.
Question & possible out for you: do they have to be ranked #13 in both the big polls, or the B(c)S? Or does it have to be unanimous between the AP, coach's, Harris, bcs, blogpoll, etc...

 
At 11:12 AM, Blogger gwzimm said...

Spare us that picture. Don't do it.

 
At 11:20 AM, Anonymous Andy said...

As mentioned above, you were predicting the final rankings, therefore, wait until the final rankings are released.

 
At 12:52 PM, Anonymous seymour85 said...

Season's not over and "On Wisconsin."

 
At 12:57 PM, Blogger The College Game said...

Go ahead and wait, but Phil Steele sold me with this pick. I am a changed pre-season guide buyer from here on out.

 
At 12:59 PM, Blogger COLOfilm said...

As your father, who has not only taught you to be a man of your word, but has also seen you naked... I advise you to welch on the bet.

 
At 2:50 PM, Anonymous JR said...

You could do like Alabama does and pick whichever poll suits your interests best! Fake National Championships, Painted Bloggers. It's all the same.

 
At 2:51 PM, Anonymous mike said...

Without that "Wildcat" shit that Houston Nutt's 9-year old son tells him to run they'd be .500. McFadden is an incredible athlete, but he alone shouldn't be able to beat anyone. If the SEC doesnt shut down this foolishness next year then they suck hard.

I say wait until after the bowl, as it's the most important part of the season. However if they beat Wisconsin, maybe incorporate stomping a badger into the picture to shut them up about that 11-1OMFGWTF!!!! garbage. Good luck keeping your dignity intact.

 
At 3:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

how about you do it now and if they stay in the top 13 after the bowl your wife or girlfriend wears only the boxers (however she must be hot)

 
At 11:10 AM, Anonymous canuck said...

"I will post a picture of myself painted red wearing nothing but Razorbacks boxers."

Any good lawyer would parse that and advise you that your are morally obliged to 1) take a picture of yourself 2) don said boxers 3) paint the picture red 4) post said picture.

 
At 11:52 AM, Anonymous ProtonJockey said...

1--> Season's not over 'till after bowl season.

2--> You're still screwed.

3--> In response to that long drivel above, well, the car wasn't torched per se, it was more of an explosion.

4--> *sigh,* nothing I haven't seen before back at school...

 
At 8:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Records count for bowl games, stats apply to player's regular season numbers, so should this. Go after the game. Plus, i really could pass on seeing you like that anyway.

 
At 5:24 PM, Blogger Crazy Tom said...

after bowl season, and as for this: Any good lawyer would parse that and advise you that your are morally obliged to 1) take a picture of yourself 2) don said boxers 3) paint the picture red 4) post said picture, that may be true. But a great lawyer will tell you to take a picture of yourself, paint it red, and put the pair of boxers on the picture, then take a picture of that and post it.

 
At 5:29 PM, Blogger Crazy Tom said...

The season ends after a bowl game. And while it may be true that "Any good lawyer would parse that and advise you that your are morally obliged to 1) take a picture of yourself 2) don said boxers 3) paint the picture red 4) post said picture", a great lawyer will tell you to take a picture of yourself, paint it red, put boxers on the picture, and post a picture of the picture wearing the boxers.

 

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